NOT TODAY SATAN...I mean Mike Pence

(A version of this post fist appeared on the citizen.education website.)

Today is the day we, as a nation, observe the birthday of Civil Rights Icon Martin Luther King, Jr. (who was born on January 15, 1929). Today is also the day lots of white people with selective memories shape shift like decepticons into progressive, social justice allies. History, their voting patterns, and their comment sections indicate that they probably loved the good Reverend Doctor then about as much as they love Colin Kaepernick now. But once a year, to show how much they’ve always stood for equality and justice for “The Blacks,” they will trot out some of MLK’s more famous quotes and plaster them on their social media pages, complete with fancy filters and fonts. If they’re feeling particularly introspective, they may mention something contained in his “Letter from Birmingham Jail,” circa 1963. Most times they stick to excerpts from King’s 1963 “I Have a Dream” speech, (which even he decried as superficial “optimism” that needed to be “tempered with solid realism” later in life). Rarely do they venture into the world of King from 1965-1968.

(Wait…y’all do know King didn’t get assassinated right after the Lincoln Memorial speech, right? I mean, I realize history conveniently leaves out MOST of his orations and writings in order to paint a defanged picture of him—especially the ones with stern language condemning America for its continued economic injustice toward minorities and poor whites, after Civil Rights Legislation had been signed into law. History would also LOVE for you to believe that this speech was the end of his social justice career…but nah. His vision advanced beyond the “dream” to his involvement in the Poor People’s Campaign...which ultimately got him murdered by a lone racist named James *cough* the government *cough* Earl Ray.)

When trying to convince people to do something, using the words of a prominent historical figure has been known to influence the masses and drive the point home. No matter the context of the original quote, if just one sentence fits a particular situation it will get chopped and screwed into a remix of “wise words.” King’s words are no exception to this rule, suffering an ironic twist of fate: the ones on tolerance and non-violence are often the tools white people use to try and silence the cries of injustice and intolerance from the very people King was fighting for.

On Sunday, during his vacation from the Hollow Tree Factory, Keebler Elf Mike Pence was the latest abuser of King’s Dream speech. During a “Face the Nation” interview with Margaret Brennan, Pence had the unmitigated gall to not only misrepresent Martin Luther King’s words, he compared King to the bloated Big Mac with sentience currently running our country, Donald Trump. (If you would like to take a second to rinse out your mouth, go right ahead. I threw up a little when I heard it too.)

Michael Pence, the sitting Vice-President of the United States of America, decided that the best way to make a point about the need for a xenophobic wall—which his party is currently holding the country hostage over (the government has been shut down 31 days and counting), was to quote a man who stood for equality among races. WHUT?
I don’t know what kind of product Mike uses to keep that dusty white hair helmet in place, but it must have toxins that are seeping into his pores, through his skull and affecting his brain. Pixie cut Pence stated, with a straight face mind you: “Honestly, you know, the hearts and minds of the American people today are thinking a lot about it being the weekend we are remembering the life and the work of Reverend Martin Luther King Jr. One of my favorite quotes from Dr. King was, ‘Now is the time to make real the the promises of democracy…’ You think of how he changed America, he inspired us to change through the legislative process, to become a more perfect union, that’s exactly what President Trump is calling on the Congress to do, come to the table in a spirit of good faith.”
If you don’t get your intellectually dishonest ass up out of here, Michael.

To start, when people talk about “One of my favorite quotes”, they usually don’t have to stare down at a piece of paper to repeat it. If it’s a “favorite,” you can usually recite it from memory, no? Yet in the video, you notice Pence looks down to READ his favorite MLK quote off of a document in front of him. Interesting. Maybe he had a memory lapse because the quote is so out of context. You see, when Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr. spoke of the promises of democracy, he was speaking about giving people equal rights. Here is the full text:
“We have also come to this hallowed spot to remind America of the fierce urgency of now. This is no time to engage in the luxury of cooling off or to take the tranquilizing drug of gradualism. Now is the time to make real the promises of democracy. Now is the time to rise from the dark and desolate valley of segregation to the sunlit path of racial justice. Now is the time to lift our nation from the quicksands of racial injustice to the solid rock of brotherhood. Now is the time to make justice a reality for all of God’s children.” Yet y’all want us to detach from reality and common sense…to the extent of believing…MARTIN LUTHER KING, JUNIOR would have DESIRED us to perpetuate the current RACIAL DISCRIMINATION toward Latino/Latina peoples through the democratic action of…FUNDING A COMPLETELY UNNECESSARY WALL TO SHOW HOW MUCH THEY ARE NOT WELCOME…IN THIS COUNTRY OF IMMIGRANTS? Ok.

While true that King inspired us to “change through the legislative process,” the change he sought is one that today’s Republican party actively fights against. We are nowhere near a more perfect union, and this administration is currently flying a raggedy looking Trump plane in the complete opposite direction. What Pence and his ilk are doing is completely adverse what King wanted, needed, or instructed us to do…yet they invoke his name in an attempt to get people on board with their bigotry and hatred. This commonplace perversion of his words is exactly the reason why lauded Chicago writer and public servant Leslé Honoré wrote the poem “my king” in 2017 (her entire book is amazing and poignant in our current social climate, and can be purchased here):

Somebody needs to tell Pence and those like him to get their hands and minds right… right off of the words and legacy of Reverend Doctor Martin Luther King, Jr. They didn’t respect their magnitude and meaning then, and they surely don’t now. If you’re not about his mission? Keep his name out your mouth. 

Wall Woes

(A version of this post first appeared on the citizen.education website.)

Reading the news these days feels more like reading a script for an experimental spinoff of “House of Cards.” Contrived crises which affect elections, plea deals for criminal activity, and constant chaos at 1600 Pennsylvania feels as though this administration lifted it’s strategies straight from Netflix. Unfortunately, no one in this version is as smart as the TV characters, so it’s more like all political decisions are being made by Tom Hammerschmidt’s dog. No shade to the dog.

On the heels of losing the House to Democrats, the petulant persimmon presiding over America’s fate is poised to throw yet another tantrum over his border wall funding. Trump wants our government to guarantee him $5 Billion (with a B) toward building a “big, fat, beautiful wall" between the US and Mexico. Never mind that the ENTIRE TIME this idiot yodeled about a damn wall on the campaign trail, he swore Mexico was gonna pay for it (and Mexican legislators have said time and time again NO THE FU@K WE AIN’T); Never mind that Congress told him early on in his tenure he needs to go saddown somewhere with this ridiculous request, and that the cost of the wall has ballooned up to three times the original estimates (latest one puts the cost at around $21 Billion); Never mind that he already threatened to shutdown the government over this issue earlier this year, and still didn’t get his way; Donnie wants his wall, and there’s nothing you level headed, law abiding adults can do to change his mind.

The fact that there are thousands of asylum seekers at the border right now, fleeing life threatening gang violence and poverty caused by their own government’s implosion, is pouring racist gasoline on this dumpster fire of an issue. Weeks before the migrant caravan was even close to the US, Trump started his Paul Revere/Chicken Little routine: running around the country at various GOP political rallies shouting “The immigrants are coming! The fences are falling!” Obviously, this was in an effort to make sure bigoted, xenophobic white people would go out and vote Republican, but it also laid a firm foundation for the reemergence of his wall whining. This may explain why the GOP led congress kicked the can of funding the wall down the road until after midterms. He has since deployed around 5,900 active duty troops to the border, (in addition to the 2,100 national guardsmen already there, costing taxpayers around $210 Million), and recently gave authorization to the military for the use of lethal force against the migrants…even though being admitted as a refugee and seeking asylum in America is a perfectly legal process.

All of this builds pressure on congress right before a vote on the budget, which includes his outrageous wall ask. As we all know, pressure bursts pipes, but in this case? Trump is hoping that pressure builds him a wall. Let’s hope this venture ends up just like the majority of the ones he takes in business: as a spectacular failure.

Immigration: Good Only When White

(A version of this post first appeared on the citizen.education website.)

Looking like he was fresh out of a tanning bed where the color control was set somewhere between “pumpkin pie” and “apple cider,” our Idiot in Chief decided to rile up his racist base by speaking on immigration again Tuesday.

In his statement full of falsehoods, fallacies, and fictitious fantasies, he claimed that the migrant caravan currently moving north from Central America contained MS-13 gang members and Middle Eastern terrorists, financed by Venezuelan leftists and “the democrats, maybe.” Ooook…let’s pretend that the migrants aren't currently running FROM MS-13 gang members. Let’s also assume that Middle Eastern terrorists can’t think of more convenient ways to enter America than flying to Central America, trekking over a THOUSAND miles, on FOOT, through various countries, for MONTHS. (Not to mention Middle Eastern and African immigrants accounted for only 0.7% of border apprehensions last year.) The caravan being funded by “Venezuelan leftists,” when the country of Venezuela is literally in economic free-fall, has to be one of the most laughable parts. WHO is funding a mass exodus of thousands of people? WHAT exactly is being funded—their lack of food, water and shelter? WHEN and WHERE were these funds supposedly collected? HOW are the funds being disbursed? And WHY? What would the end goal even be?!? Proof to back Trumpito’s ramblings is non-existent. He’s actually admitted this. There is absolutely no proof. But facts and truth don’t really matter to anyone in this administration, as demonstrated by Puppet Pence’s presence and support of these nonsensical claims, and Sarah Sanders’ routine doubling down on lies.

If we looked beyond the smoke and funhouse mirrors of this white house, we would see that this administration doesn’t have a problem with immigrants coming to the United States; they only have a problem with certain kinds and colors of immigrants that are coming. As demonstrated by his “shithole countries” remark back in January of this year, the tangerine tyrant isn’t too keen on people that don’t look like him coming to the good ol’ US of A. Yet, people of the paler hue are welcomed with open arms, namely his mail order bride’s wife’s parents. In fact, Melania’s mom and dad became United States citizens through the same program he decried as a dirty process. In a November 2017 tweet, he stated “CHAIN MIGRATION must end now! Some people come in, and they bring their whole family with them, who can be truly evil. NOT ACCEPTABLE!” Two months later, his in-laws took advantage of it, and gained their citizenship. It reminds me of an old saying prevalent in the south: “If you’re White, you’re alright, if you’re Brown, stick around, if you’re Black, stay back.” In Trump’s America, however, the 2018 remix would be “If you’re White, you’re alright AND SCREW THE REST OF YOU.”